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Week One Standings

9/12/2017

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The defending champion Redlegs start 2017 atop the AFC standings once again, while the NFC champion Dirty Hippies failed to break triple-digits in their 2017 debut. The PFC champion Dirty Dogs, however, managed to start their title defense with a victory. 

The injuries of David Johnson and Allen Robinson have reverberated across the league. Their owners already face adversity in the young season. 
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'Dirty Hippies', NFC Win Liberty Bowl; 2016 Wrap-up

1/2/2017

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By OIL Commissioner Justin C. Cliburn
Congratulations to Christopher Trovillo, whose Dirty Hippies won the 2016 Liberty Bowl. He will hold the Tenequer Memorial Trophy in trust until a new champion is crowned. He also earned a custom mini-helmet with the win, and the Commissioner awaits his instructions regarding said helmet. 

As far as Lance Zerger goes, his Redlegs fell short in their quest to win their first week 17 championship. But the season was a monstrous success regardless. The Redlegs set a record for most points in single season, won 12 games, and won the AFC's Thunder Bowl. He will have his name engraved on the Killman Memorial Trophy and his custom jersey has been ordered. 
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Well, that's it for the 2016 OIL season. Congratulations to the three conference champions: Buehre, Trovillo, and Zerger. The 2017 draft order will be posted soon, and I'll get started on the 2016 edition of the Book of OIL. Be prepared for lots of emails soliciting your feedback on the 2016 draft party, trades, rivalry week, season, and playoffs.

Zerger has plans to coordinate an OIL March Madness pool, and we'll be finding ways to raise money for the 2017 draft weekend, which will again occur at the Roberts Retreat Lodge north of Ada. Our deposit has been paid, and we need to pay $3,100 by August to keep the rental (and not lose the $780 deposit). Anyone who was at the 2016 draft can vouch for how amazing the venue is: 5,000 square-foot cabin; private lake; ATV trails; shooting range; ping pong table; big screen TVs; huge wrap-around porch; and the company of your SECFOR brothers. 

If you'd like to make your donation now, the link is here. You can view photos, videos, and audio clips of the 2016 draft weekend here. If you encounter a password prompt, the password is oklahoma*** with the *** being the number of our military unit. 

Happy New Year, brothers. Something tells me we'll keep in touch all offseason using the GroupMe chat (thanks to Zerger for suggesting that). For all of those who didn't win a championship in 2016 (including me), the new year provides new hope. In the meantime, check out the championship banners hung at the top of each champion's manager page:
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2016 Semifinals Preview

12/15/2016

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Only 12 teams remain in contention in the OIL playoffs after Nye, Roe, Cliburn, Jessen, Baldwin, and Cordes were knocked out in round one. Half of the semifinals field had a bye last week, so this is their first test since Rivalry Week. Good luck, guys. As always, game-by-game analysis after the jump.
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NFC: Cliburn's Rivalry Week Preview

12/2/2016

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By Arrogant Americans ​Manager Justin C. Cliburn
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It took 12 weeks, but we finally have 2/3 of the playoff picture sorted out. Pyle, Cobb, Finch, and Cliburn have clinched playoff spots. Jessen, Trovillo, Bruesch, and Duffy are fighting for the final two berths. That makes this Rivalry Week incredibly important. Each of the four managers still hoping to clinch a playoff spot are in absolute must-win situations in this, the most important week of the season. Good luck to everyone but Duffy. Fuck Duffy, for this is Hate Week.
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Head-to-head records in paranthesis

#4 Arrogant Americans vs. #8 Hangovers
​(8-4)

Duffy has a very slim chance at the playoffs, even with a victory during Rivalry Week. So this game will be his OIL Bowl. Meanwhile, Cliburn has clinched a playoff spot. The 'Mericans are not as strong as their record indicates, but they're facing a Hangovers team that has battled injuries and disappointment all season. I am picking my 'Mericans to take back the crown in this grudge match.

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NFC: Cliburn's Week 12 Preview

11/24/2016

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By Arrogant Americans Manager Justin C. Cliburn
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Week 12 promises to answer a lot of questions about the playoff picture. Jessen, Finch, and Cobb can each stake a strong claim to the number two playoff seed with wins this week. Duffy, Schmidt, Bruesch, and Trovillo can see their playoff hopes dwindle with losses. And Pyle can get one step closer to tying the record for best regular-season record. 

I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving. As cheesy as it sounds, my favorite Thanksgiving was spent with all of you 10 years ago at Camp Virginia, Kuwait. Here is what I wrote of that day almost exactly 10 years ago:

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Happy Thanksgiving.


Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday.  It always seemed so
genuine to me, unlike other holidays which most people see solely as
an excuse to receive gifts, drink beer, or skip work.  Perhaps it was
how my parents treated Thanksgiving that made me appreciate it so
much.  I remember every year my mom would only allow us to have
thirteen kernels of corn on our plate because that was the ration the
Pilgrims had to sustain themselves with in order to survive that fall
and winter.  Looking at the thirteen kernels sitting alone on the
periphery of my gigantic plate, I gained an appreciation for just how
much they struggled, perservered, and, most of all, appreciated what
little they did have.  Eating the thirteen kernels often left a
contemplative emptiness in my belly.  Of course, after we finished the
original thirteen, we were welcome to eat more, but the point was
made, and it has stuck with me since.

In my military career, I have spent Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday,
at Fort Sill, Oklahoma; Yakima Training Center, Washington; and, now,
Camp Virginia, Kuwait.  None of those places I would consider my first
choice to spend the holiday, any holiday, but, again, it gave me an
opportunity to think of how lucky I am.  This year is the worst, and,
at the same time, the best.

Camp Virginia is nothing more than a series of buildings, surrounded
by sand berms and guard towers, in the middle of the Kuwaiti
wasteland.  There is no cultural consolation prize to being housed
here; it's not high on anyone's "to visit" list.  It is that vastness
and emptiness, however, that give us all a chance to reflect on how
lucky we really are.

We just left Baghdad, where mundane, everyday tasks like grocery
shopping are life-threatening.  No one trusts anyone; everyone is a
target.  Death and destruction are an unavoidable part of life, and
kids like my friend Ali grow up in it.

As I reflect on how lucky I am to have left that place, all I can
think about is Ali and the millions of children just like him.  I
think of how bad they have it . . . and how positively Ali, Hidar, and
Ahmed seemed to accept and handle it.  They were still thankful for
their families, for their friends, and for their lives.  They are a
true example of perserverence.  I am so very grateful that my brother
and I never had to grow up in their world, and I am similarly grateful
that my niece will not have to do so either.

We had a very well-intentioned but lackluster Thanksgiving meal at the
chow hall this afternoon after our commander shared a few words with
us.  Most importantly, he pointed out that we are all still here,
alive and healthy.  That was not what I had expected a year ago, and I
am grateful that our mission changed to the less dangerous PSD
mission.  We're here; we're alive.

After lunch and a couple of hours of preparation, we had the inaugural
First Platoon versus Third Platoon Flag Football Thanksgiving
Challenge.  It was eleven on eleven, with a full offensive and
defensive line.  Talk about grudge match; we're all hurting now.  I
took a few arms to the throat, hands to the face, elbows to the body,
scratches to the arms and face, and a few head to head shots.  I was
not alone.  We made it this far without serious injury, but we tried
our damndest to get one before we left.

Third platoon won both games by a substantial margin because they are
bastards, but it was a great experience nonetheless. That's okay;
we'll get 'em next deployment.

 This is certainly a Thanksgiving that I will never forget.  It won't
be long until I am home, but, today at least, that wasn't what I was
thinking about.  My friends up north, the ones I met and the ones I
haven't yet met were heavy on my mind as I enjoyed a day devoid of
helicopters, gunfire, mortars, explosions, or frustrating hours
outside the wire.  I hope that my friends in uniform up north will
come home safe and sound as well, and I hope everyday that real change
will happen, so that Ali and others like him will be able to grow up
in the same sense of security that I did.  They're grand wishes, I
know, but if there is anytime to be optimistic, it's today
Now, on to the games.

Game of the Week:
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#5 Arrogant Americans vs. #3 DominationStation

This is #3 versus #5. A team trying to clinch a first-round bye versus a team just trying to clinch a playoff berth. Jessen is favored by a large margin on paper, but he'll be counting on Gronkowski to play and Ryan Mathews not to play (allowing Wendell Smallwood to get the bulk of the carries). So, while I'm not calling an Arrogant Americans upset, don't be surprised if it happens. 

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NFC: Cliburn's Week 11 Preview

11/18/2016

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By Arrogant Americans ​Manager Justin C. Cliburn
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Well, Pyle has clinched a playoff spot, and it looks like Cobb won't be far behind him. We're in the home stretch with nine teams vying for playoff spots. 

#8 Dirty Hippies vs. #2 Dogs of War

I've been calling for someone to beat Cobb for weeks now, and I think this is the week it gets done. Cobb just has too many players on bye this week. Hippies win big.

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NFC: Cliburn's Week 10 Preview

11/9/2016

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By Arrogant Americans ​Justin C. Cliburn
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After nine weeks, 10 teams appear to still be in the playoff hunt, with three teams (Pyle, Cobb, and Finch) the primary competition for the two first-round playoff byes. Jessen is right on their heels and, if Finch and Cobb slip up, DominationStation could run the table and steal the second playoff seed.

Game of the Week:
​#3 Hard Targets vs. #2 Dogs of War

If Finch wins this one, he's well on his way to securing a record fourth-consecutive first-round bye in the playoffs. But standing in his way is Cobb, who has won five straight. Both teams are dealing with bye weeks, but Finch's team has more depth. I'm picking the Hard Targets to finally humble Cobb.

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NFC: Cliburn's Week Nine Preview

11/2/2016

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By Arrogant Americans ​Manager Justin C. Cliburn
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Well, Henderson did everyone a solid by upsetting Pyle, but Jessen couldn't do his part in beating Cobb. Now we've got a humbled 7-1 Lucky Enuf team at number one and a cockier-by-the-day Cobb in second place at 6-2. Week nine is the second of two "bye-nados," as six NFL teams are have a bye week. Good luck, everyone.

#6 DominationStation vs. #4 Hangovers

Jessen has Rob Gronkowski and David Johnson on bye, so I'm picking Duffy to win the matchup of the week. 

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NFC: Cliburn's Week Eight Preview

10/26/2016

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By Arrogant Americans​ Manager Justin C. Cliburn
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Part of being a good leader is admitting when you're wrong, and I've been wrong the last few weeks. Here I've been calling for someone, anyone, to finally beat Pyle and wipe that undefeated smirk off his face . . . when the real villain here is clearly Cobb. Yes, Pyle just won to get to 7-0, but Cobb is the cocky one in this equation. Have you seen his gloating in the GroupMe chat?
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And the latest? He's bragging about beating Schmidt. We all know Schmidt has never been a threat to win the league, but this week he only put up 116 points. Cobb put up a paltry 125 points on the board and acts like he just stomped the '85 Bears. Thankfully, for the rest of us, Cobb faces a real test this week.

Game of the Week:
#4 DominationStation vs. #2 Dogs of War

Jessen, I am addressing this directly to you: you are our only hope. It took the league two years to recover from the pain of Cobb's 2013 championship. He wouldn't shut up about it, even though we all knew his 7-6 regular season record was only saved by Peyton Manning. Now, he's 5-2 with one of the easiest schedules in the league. His ego is getting big. It needs to be reined in. That's where you come in, Jessen. Fresh off of player swap sexual assaulting Rogers, your team is primed to make a run for the title. Your run starts now. Beat Cobb. Do it for you. Do it for the OIL. Do it for America.

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NFC: Cliburn's Week Seven Preview

10/19/2016

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By Arrogant Americans Manager Justin C. Cliburn
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Another week, another lost opportunity to knock Pyle off his perch. This time it was Finch trying and failing to knock off Lucky Enuf, who is now at 6-0 and two games ahead of the second-place team. This week it's the Hippies' turn to humble Pyle. Godspeed, Trovillo.

Game of the Week:
​#6 ​Dirty Hippies vs. #1 Lucky Enuf

This is not only my game of the week; it's my uniform matchup of the week as well. As for the actual game, if Ben Roethlisberger were playing this week, I would give the Hippies a chance here. But Big Ben is out and Terrelle Pryor is dealing with a bad hammy. Look for Lucky Enuf's good fortune to extend another week. Pyle gets to 7-0, and the rest of us look forward to the next opportunity for Pyle to fall.

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